Day In The Life: Summer 2018


8:00am. Piper slept in and I'm shocked when we wake up and it's already 8:00. This seldom happens and when it does I'm pretty happy about the extra sleep.
Piper and I crawl out of bed and leave sleeping Adri beside us (she got into bed with us at some point in the wee hours of the morning) and head downstairs. I make coffee, and check emails while Piper plays.

8:45am. Adri wakes and comes downstairs. While I finish emails she Facetimes with her aunties and then I get both her and Piper settled eating cereal while I make breakfast for myself (eggs with leftover fried potatoes and chicken). After making and eating breakfast I get the girls down from their seats, clean up Piper, and then put dinner in the crock-pot (pulled pork), clean the kitchen, and hang a load of laundry.




9:30am. I have a couple writing projects due so I start working on those while the girls play. After working for about an hour I get up and clean upstairs, make a couple phone calls, and clean the bathrooms. In the middle of all that I stop to nurse Piper for a little bit.


11:00am. The girls are still playing and I'm wrapping up a few more emails, checking some things and starting a new writing project. I'm going to end up taking a break to read to Adri though and put Piper down for her nap.

11:30am. Piper only sleeps a few minutes and then pops back awake. We clean the house and vacuum. Then we all head upstairs and I get in the shower with both girls. We all get cleaned up and then dressed. Every day I do showers and then a couple times a week we do baths in the tub at night for them.

1:15pm. I take the girls outside and let them play around for a bit while I take the garbage out to the road (I've forgotten to take it out the past two weeks so there's a pretty big pile), clean up the yard and pick up the back porch. It's supposed to rain in the afternoon and I figure they should get some fresh air while it's still nice out.

2:00pm. I make a couple snack plates for Adri and me, and then we eat while I nurse Piper and put her down for a nap. Adri has quiet time and I do some more work, answering emails, writing down notes for this post (so I can remember everything), and make a couple more phone calls.



3:00pm. Adam arrives home, I finish answering emails, complete the last writing project and then take Adri Rose with me to the kitchen to make cupcakes. Cupcakes made, and Piper wakes from her nap. We read stories, take care of Adri's mice and hamsters, and then it's time for me to work on dinner.

4:00pm. I cook some rice, shred the pork chops cooking in the crock-pot, and make biscuits. Dinner ready, I call Adam and we make plates and go eat in the living room while watching a t.v show. Piper usually eats while I cook so she just steals bites from us while we are eating.
Okay, true confessions here: we grew up eating all meals around the table and it's something I thought that I would do with my family. And while yes, I eat all breakfasts at the table with the girls, the rest of the meals are usually in the living room. Not how I thought things would be, but it's what works for us.


6:00pm. Time begin getting ready for bed. I have Adri help me go through and clean up the house, while I wash the dinner dishes and clean the kitchen. We all hang out, read books, and play with the girlies.

8:00pm. Adam heads upstairs (the girls have trouble falling asleep when he's around #funparentproblems) and I nurse Piper to sleep. I put Piper down in her DockATot to sleep and then hold Adri, rub her back and legs and we talk about her day. This is probably one of my favorite daily rituals. We talk about things and I snuggle her and give hugs and kisses. Last night was pretty emotional because she was asking where her Grammy was and got pretty upset (she's still working on the concept of death and heaven, etc).  If any of you has experience explaining such things to a three-year-old would you please email or message me with some advice? It would be greatly appreciated.


9:00pm. Both kiddos in bed, I finish my glass of wine and my t.v show and then head to bed. I browse around on my phone for a bit and then fall asleep.

10:00pm. Everyone out for the night! (yes, we are an early to bed, early to rise, family).

Comments

  1. Your days have a nice rhythm to them.

    Your words about Adri and Grammy broke my heart. My advice is to not make death a fearful thing, it is a part of life. God knows all our days before even one of them come to be. (Psalm139:16). I’ve spoken to all my children openly about it through the years. My youngest was barely a year old when my grandmother died. He knows the stories because we’ve kept her a part of our lives.

    Talk openly about Jewels; her love for you all, the way she loved to sing. Adri will have memories because you share them. Tell her how she delighted in being a mother and Grammy. And tell her it’s okay to miss her, because you always will.

    ❤️

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    1. Thanks so much Deanna. That is all so helpful. We have been trying to talk a lot about it and not make it a sad or fearful thing. She still asks a lot of questions and wants to go "visit her" and we've had to try to explain more about the concept of heaven to her, which for some reason is hard for her to grasp. ox

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  2. Dear Rosie. I am a Christian but with different beliefs about the outcome of death. However like you I lost a parent unexpectedly when my youngest was 3 years old. Living on a farm, birth and death were norms of life. However my 3 year old asked me shortly after my dad died "How is going to fit?" Not understanding the question inquired more to be told, " When my Goldfish died we flushed it down the toilet. How will Opa fit through the hole in the toilet?" I am sorry but even I couldn't stop laughing.My eldest in his 20's called from the other room,"They use a bigger toilet". She was content with that. Don't make it complicated because they don't understand. They know you are sad and want to make you happy. Just assure your girls that their grandma and you love them very much and that someday you will meet again.Remind them when you make grandma favourite recipe, or grandma's favourite story or flower. It makes them understand the wonderful Jewel she was. God Bless.

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    1. That is all such good advice. It seems the key may be to keep it simple. She's having a hard time understanding why we can't go and see her and up to know death has not really been a concept we've had to explain to her. We are sticking to the "Grammy is in heaven and we will see her again someday" story and it does seem to be (sorta) working. ox

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  3. When my grandma, who had been very close to us, passed away, Shira was 4 and Tehilla 2.5. It was a little easier because her death did not come as such a shock - she was 97 and declined rapidly in her final year - but what I did was just talk simply and honestly with the girls. It took more than one time, of course. The concept of never seeing her again, at least not in this lifetime, gradually sank in - for me as well as for them.

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    1. Hi Anna, I think that is the hard part for Adri, not understand why we can't go and see her. I think she just really misses my mom and finally realized that she hasn't seen her in a long time and doesn't know why we can't go visit in heaven lol I think you're right that it'll just take time. ox

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  4. Ah so hard...we have found letting our youngest grandchild express her sorrow over the loss of the family dog...OFTEN...has helped her. She asked me one day if I thought the dog was a good dog and I said YES! And would he then be in Heaven with GOD? I said to her, "I don't know why not!!" She says less now...and only that she misses him. We have not been allowed by our grandchildren's athiest parents to talk openly about our faith. But I sure HOPE my favorite dogs will meet me one day...and as our rabbi said when I asked him, "Well, life doesn't end here! Why not?" Love that answer. (He had kitties he loved...heh perspective can be helpful!!)

    As to the family dinner table...I do empathize!! It can be a real blessing to all eat at table and talk to each other. But my husband preferred to sit and watch TV while eating. So sometimes one has to let some things be. Now years later...he usually wants to sit at table and talk to me...but we are old and our children long grown. Glad you have lots of kin around...seeing them frequently and eating at table with them may serve you and the children well in days to come, regardless of how your hubby wants it.

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    1. Ah, that is sweet. It's kinda strange but Adri only just recently started asking about it (she asked where Grammy was the firs couple weeks and was satisfied with a short explanation) now she's asking to see her and is way more upset about it. We are trying to keep it simple for her though.

      So there is hope that things may someday changes with eating at the table?! lol to be honest though, it really don'est bother me and I'm totally fin with it. Different then I grew up with, but different is not necessarily bad, right? lol
      ox

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    2. Different can be ok, yes. My life in some ways is very different from how I was raised. It is good that your daughters see how it is to eat at table with you and your kin...which makes it less problemic I think to eat otherwise at night. I see a problem when children NEVER eat at table...my grandkids we live near were like that...but since my daughter has left to get a divorce, the children are settling in better to eating in a civilized way. (Divorce is hard, but sometimes necessary in this difficult world). Not to say we don't vary some in when we eat together too. Life today is very different from the world my hubby and I grew up in. I have had to be very flexible about many things in my life.

      My heart hurts for you in your loss. I loved my mom so much and though she lived until I was 49...it was far too soon for me to loose her. I think your child will adapt much easier than it is for you, dear. Part of your hurt is no doubt from her questions too...so good to teach them we WILL be together one day again. Maybe a long time...but it WILL come. I think HOPE helps even children. Blessngs to you dear!

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